Oh my goodness, can you believe 2024 is here already? It feels like I blinked once and 2023 was here and gone. What a wild ride it was, at least for me anyway. I spent a lot of time at home in hermit mode, even more than my heart; my soul needed that.

I closed out 2023 with admiration for myself, acknowledging all the things I went through and my ability to push through things I strongly doubted I had the strength to manage. I mention this because it’s a big deal for me. Some of you may relate when I say I am my own worst critic. Admittedly, I am so incredibly hard on myself.

I did some heavy self-reflection at the end of 2023. I flipped the pages back in my journal and reread some of the, for lack of a better word, shit I dealt with, both internally and externally, and couldn’t help but cry my lil heart out. I am so proud of me.

It’s in those moments when I’m sitting by myself with a glass of wine, reading my own journal like a book, that I’m reminded why I love to write so much. Getting my thoughts, feelings, experiences, and emotions out of my head and onto paper is so… freeing.

I’ve learned a lot, and I still have so much more to learn. I still have so much internal work to do, so much more healing. When I peel back a layer, I discover something else. That might sound and seem exhausting to some, but what I’ve learned is that the most beautiful piece of art I will ever look at is what I see staring back at me in the mirror, even on my worst days, when I don’t feel good on the inside or on the outside.

I’ve learned that when I am at my lowest, at my most vulnerable and honest with myself, that is when I am the most beautiful. I’m so sensitive. People have always said that to me—‘You’re so sensitive.’ I used to be ashamed and embarrassed about that. I’m learning that my sensitivity is a gift, and while boundaries are necessary, I love that I feel everything so deeply. I love that about me. I love the woman I am becoming because I leaned into my sensitivity.

I don’t mean to make a 2024 post all about me, but I think it’s important to share because it’s a reminder to whoever may come across this and read it: you too can find peace, love, happiness, contentment, healing, and so many things to love about yourself. That’s the whole reason I started this blog. I thought of myself as an emotionally chaotic mess who sometimes still felt alone even in a room full of people who love me. I thought, well, if I share my experiences, maybe it’ll help at least one person feel less like an emotionally chaotic mess.

I hope this year you do more of what you love, and if you’re reading this and thinking to yourself, ‘I don’t know what I love,’ I hope you spend time figuring out what you do because, if you think about it, what is the point if we aren’t enjoying the people, places, and experiences that add a richness to our lives that you can’t buy with cash or card?

I am not the same person I was a year ago. I’m not the same person I was six months ago. Isn’t it incredible that you can decide to wake up tomorrow and start over, to be different and better? That’s all we can do.

Please know that I am not perfect because, oh man, am I the furthest thing from it. Please also know that the positivity committee didn’t come find me and heal me, haha. I still struggle, some days more than others. Sometimes I’ll cry for a half hour and then look in the mirror and say, “bestie you are okay, everything is going to be okay” or, “damn girlie time to get it together, put your feet on the grass” LMAO.

I like to take breaks when I write my posts and reread what I’ve written so far because these lil fingys start moving and I don’t remember all that I’ve written, and I’ll tell you right now, there will be days this month and throughout this entire year when I will need to be reminded of exactly what I’ve written today.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for being here with me. I feel so much gratitude when people take the time to read what I write. It feels good when I receive emails or messages from people, most of the time from those I don’t even know, who thank me for sharing and being vulnerable. It’s not easy for me, but somehow I’m still doing it, haha.

Have the most magical, healing, happy, empowering, peaceful year. You deserve it. You can do ALL the things!

I love you guys so, so much.

See ya next time,

Erica